The Three Tenants of a Good Introductory Event

So, you want to build community? Want to make some friends, mm? Very good, these are things that you should desire. But, to do this you need to develop relationships with others, grow those relationships, and to do that you need people and a reason to get together. After the step of finding people to spend time with, this is the hardest point for many people. Today it is a common case that people do not know how to spend time together, and so rarely do gather anymore, or rarely do so in a way that is appealing to others outside of an already established group. The situation of the day is worsened by the fact that the groups and communities we used to rely on for social interaction are now, for the most part dissolved. Sports groups, clubs, guilds, things that used to be common have now gone the way of the Dodo. And now what we are left with are churches and bars as places to meet people, and neither are well suited for creating community. Hypothetically a church would be a great place for community, but look at the common church in American right now and see that there is no community in that parish or congregation.

I'm finished being a downer now. The point was made, community is lacking, so what to do about it? Among the dozens of things that could and should be done, one is creating enjoyable opportunities for people to come together. In other words, become an event planner. I don't mean in the way that you could put it on a resume, instead in the sense that you think of activities others would like to do and you run them. And what kind of events are appealing to others? How do you get people to want to come to the things you're putting on? That is the purpose of this article. You have to make it appealing to people, and that's what I'm going to break down now.

Many different kinds of things draw people to many different kinds of events. Eventually you can start having things such as a group outing to a concert, laser tag, river tubing, a gun range day, a camping trip, etc. - but to start off with, you want a "low barrier to entry" to get people together in the first place to build friendships. Many things make up a good event, but we will focus on three that are pretty universal: Free, Food, and Fun.

Why are these three things important to make an event successful? Because they do away with the barriers of entry that may normally keep a person from coming to an event. A person looking for community is looking for reasons to go to your event, so you should make it as easy as possible for them to say yes to come.

Free - what you're doing should either have no cost associated with it, or the cost should be very low. For young adults, and young families, many have little cash to spare, and some will be in this situation for a long time. Being alive is expensive, after all. There are many who live paycheck-to-paycheck with little financial wiggle room, and these see events taking place in different diocese and want to participate but cannot because of the money required to join. And on top of this, free is a very attractive price.

Food - many in ministry have attested to the impact food has on the attendance of events. A simple pizza party for a youth group can double the number of kids who would normally participate. Doughnuts and coffee after church on Sunday does not guarantee that people will stay and socialize, but it makes it much more likely. And for a get-together - a board game night, a bonfire, a Bible study - if you want people to come then you should have some kind of food to entice them. A snack, a full meal, something to drink, whatever you do have should depend on the type of event you have. And in your first few events it may be all up to you for food, but in later ones you absolutely can enlist the help of others for food.

Fun - it should go without saying that your event should have a draw to it. There is a blessing to those communities that go to Adoration together, join silent retreats, and help out at soup kitchens; now, having said that, you are unlikely to grow a community beyond just a few people if you choose to have these events as your "fun get-togethers". Your event should actually be fun, and then after participating in fun events together you propose ideas such as Adoration that are beyond the activities that are simply fun. When a man wants to enter into a relationship with a woman he does not start off with marriage, he begins with fun dates that help the two get to know each other. Begin your community events with something Fun, and after you build that community up then you can branch into the other virtues of a good community: Service and Worship.

The takeaway I want you to have from this article is simple, make it as easy as possible for others to come to your events. To build community you need people, so do what people want. Be virtuous while you do it, be good Christian examples at all times, and be appealing so that others will want to join you. Start off with things that you enjoy doing that you know is enjoyed by others (sports, board games, swimming, hiking, etc.) and invite others. Once you get one other person to join you (see article on the Principle of the 2nd Man) it is incredibly easy to get one more, then another, then another.

Article written for the VME Society, by Ethan Hall